Social Drawing I discovered, when I was in jail, that I am what I call a "social draw-er" I've always liked to draw, and displayed some talent, but I never became truly GOOD until I was in jail. Its simple really. I draw better when I'm socializing at the same time. When I was first locked up there was very little to occupy my time. The other girls and I would sit around tables in the "rec" room and we'd talk. Sometimes we'd play cards while we were doing it, sometimes we'd have snacks, but mostly we'd talk. One of the few things we were allowed to have for entertainment sake was paper and little boxes of twelve crappy colored pencils. And since I liked art, and needed something to do with my hands while we talked I would doodle. But some of my doodles became more than doodles. Some of my doodles became really fucking good. better than anything I'd drawn before. And when I transfered from County Jail to State Prison alot more options became available for entertainment. and alot more options for privacy. But I kept drawing. And I kept drawing in the "rec" room, where there were people. Because when I tried to draw in my "cube", where I could have some privacy Nothing happened. I couldn't think of anything to put on the paper. So I'd sit in the "rec" room, and I'd sit at a table by myself, and i'd start doodling. And people would wander over to see what I was drawing.... and they'd always say "Do you want me to stop distracting you so you can work?" And I'd always say "no please, sit and talk with me, it helps me work" So they would. And now that I am free I rarely draw. Because there is no "rec" room No conversation to inspire me. Freedom has hindered my self expression. Funny how that works.

Triggers Triggers are funny. Dangerous thoughts at 2am All alone with those triggers. Grandfather clocks and Seagulls Bring panic attacks Children's laughter Leads to crushing #depression. An ad on the radio Produces tears of grief. And broken glass Creates dangerous thoughts At 2am Alone with those triggers

Cultural Diversity Potato's are my favorite food!! I like anything potato. I like them so much that, everytime I meet someone who speaks a foreign language, I have them teach me to say French fries (or fried potatos, because that is often the closest possible translation) in that language. I know it in five languages....this way, no matter where I end up I can always find tastey food!! So far I know it in French, English, Spanish, checoslovakian(which ive probably spelled wrong), and ASL Anyone care to expand my collection?

Unusual Slang: A Cautionary Tale One should take care to be certain one understands the meaning of any slang term before putting it to use... My grandmother on my father's side , when something surprised her, would always say "I'll be jiggered!" And I just love that... I keep meaning to make it part of my active vocabulary but haven't... I asked her once what it actually meant and she said she had no idea and must have heard it somewhere! I did some research ( because I'm a god damn freak and OF COURSE I did) and the definition of "jigger" can either be " to jerk vigorously up and down or "a measure of alcohol, usually gin"... So basically, my Grandma was constantly either saying she was drunk or she was masturbating... Either way it's pretty fantastic... she may not have agreed if I had told her, though

PLEASE READ This is a dangerous, volatile, unstable time to be alive for many of us. I want to make it known to any and all who see this: If you need help, I am here and I will do whatever is needed, to the best of my abilities, to make sure you stay safe and reasonably sane. If you need to vent your anger or frustration or fear or whatever else you're feeling, I will listen confidentially without judgement. If you want advice or feedback, I will give you that as well, but if you prefer I keep my thoughts to myself, I will be happy to do so. If you're in imminent danger of physical harm and for any reason aren't able to get help, I will do absolutely anything in my power to GET HELP for you, immediately. If you feel like you might not be safe wherever you are, I will find a way to get you to a safe place, even if the only place available is my own dog-hair-coated couch (hey, it's about as far from the Ritz as possible, but no one will be able to threaten or hurt you here. That is one of very few things I can be really certain of right now.) If you're looking for a distraction or something to make you laugh, or something that reminds you that there IS still beauty and hope in the world, I will shower you in completely useless random bits of information, ridiculous pug pictures, and/or true stories of exemplary human kindness, to suit your needs. If you need something I haven't specifically mentioned here, ANYTHING AT ALL, please let me know, and if I can help at all or FIND SOMEONE WHO CAN, I will. I am struggling myself, I won't be online at all times, and realistically there are going to be times that I'm not EMOTIONALLY available, and have to find help for MYSELF in the moment... but as often as possible I will make myself available and easy to reach, and if I can't respond to anyone immediately, I promise that I WILL respond as soon as I'm able to, no matter what, to anyone in need. I'm afraid... and I don't feel like anything is going to be okay again any time soon... I will probably need help from a bunch of YOU to make it through this... so please don't hesitate to ask for that from me, WE ARE IN THIS SHIT TOGETHER ❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️