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Anonymous

So after being persuaded to document my "mental health issues" and receiving comments like "just do it, it might help" and preferring IT to pen and paper i've decided to give blogging a go.

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Tradurre   10 anni fa

Voices - Today So today has not been a good day. I've spent the entire time just trying to get through it. I feel so down. Everywhere, loud noises, clutter & anxiety. I don't know whether I just want to get through to tomorrow, or I'm scared tomorrow might be the same. Why is this happening to me? In fact a better question, what is happening to me? I'm supposed to be getting better.Would I class it a typical day? In my #life there's no such thing. I'm trying to look fine to the external eyes, but I know internally it's a different story. I spend my sleeping hours having nightmares, and my waking hours listening to far from complimentary comments. I'm hanging onto reality by a thread, and walking on a tightrope that I can't work out whether I'm going to fall off, or they're going to make me jump.

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Teddy

Hope youre still fighting fella 👍
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    Anonymous
    Tradurre   10 anni fa

    Voices - Will I Make It I don't know what the future holds for me. Will I ever be able to suppress my memories of this nightmare. I envy other people for the lives they lead, but would never want to be them. I am me

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      Anonymous
      Tradurre   10 anni fa

      Voices - Trauma Drip Drip Drip. I remember that feeling. So much blood. Down the walls, scripting board, carpet, everywhere. And then it's gone. It still cuts deep in my mind and the scar will be there forever. It's killing me, and I'm going down.

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        Anonymous
        Tradurre   10 anni fa

        Voices - Feel Like I'm Going To Cry I'm not sure I really need to say anything else. Who do I trust? I'm only flesh and blood and I'm being stalked by a ghost. Someone walking in the shadows, and they're not alone. I just want the truth, and another psychological examination isn't going to give that to me. I'm filled with doubt, and I need to move on, but I need to know ... who are my friends, and who are my enemies. Should it be that black and white? Probably not, but that's how I feel. For what am I paying this price, and why do I sometimes see so horrible visions. Those dead eyes, they just keep looking at me. Engrained in my mind. When I close my eyes, I see hers, and no one seems to be able to help. Where will my search lead me?

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          Anonymous
          Tradurre   10 anni fa

          Voices - I Need To Try Harder I'm trying to stay positive. I don't like failing and my mind is not a weak link. I need to try harder, and think smartly. I can beat this. I find so many daily tasks difficult, but I've got to get on with it and get them done before I crack up. There's a long way to go. My journey has only just began.

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