Bent, Not Broken I am bent, with flaws a plenty, not broken. I am flawed, with issues a plethora, but i am still choking. #life is no joke, not a game, but a race of survival, and i am more than ready to win. These days as far as my family i feel much closer and connected. I no longer feel diseased or unwanted. I am loved, part of the team of my #life. I feel confident, and i feel happy. Happier than i have felt with my family than ever before. Thanks fellow writers. This community is quickly becoming a home for me. Peace.

How Do I Say I Love You? How do i say i love you to a family member who wont listen? Whos more concerned about going home instead of getting better? Whos hurting and crying themselves to sleep nightly? Ive never felt more alone, more so than ever before. Surgery is hard, but the healing process is truly much harder. Watching that member mentally decline is heartbreaking. Crippling me to the point of mental shutdown. Emotionally i am numb. Number than novacaine in my gums, dulling my feelings to nothing. Until it wears off, and the tears flow like waterfalls down my face like cliffhangers, drowning me in its wake. How do i get strong? How do i gain the strength through hardships like now? Or ever? I could use encouragement now more than ever before. I feel lost, broken, dead inside. I cant feel anything my appetites completely nothing, ive lost weight. Mentally im exhausted every night, suffering until i go home tomorrow, where i can put the distance and im so tired. Very tired. 24/7, 365.

United We Fall I feel like the united airlines flight 3411 is indeed infamous, but isnt it a little unnecessary? In my opinion honestly, BOTH parties are responsible. Sure, united is now socially ostracized, and will most likely be found in fault, but i feel like they BOTH Should be held accountable. United we fall, divided we fail. Keep it real, keep it friendly. Were all sharing this ONE planet. Lets not mess it up. We dont get a second chance.

Hatred This will probably be the hardest blog post ive ever written. I came out as gay at 19 years old. Things were fine of course, but not for long. Soon afterwards, a relative had started harboring feelings of pure hatred, and would start beating me for my sexuality, and it cultimated me into attempting suicide. Twice. Once was when i tried drinking axe body spray, twice when i took too many sleeping pills. The hatred wasnt the worst part, it was the flagrant abuse of blind ignorance by my parents. They would yell at me, saying im lying, trying to stir shit up, and basically told me they didnt care at all. I felt so alone, and music was my only escape. It helped ease the scars, both physical and emotional. The worst one, and this is the hardest part, was when they all ganged up on me endlessly, and would never leave me alone. I cried myself to sleep every night, and the stress was literally killing me. Recently i am residing with my abuser for a short time for a family emergency. Things were okay for the first week, but lately the feelings are being stirred up again, and honestly im scared whenever hes in the room. I could really use some encouragement, for i am a complete wreck. Thanks . Night

Chaos Recently a dear dear friend of mine passed away. Her name was tawni, like her hair. She was one of my favorite people ever, and we may have fought but we always made up. She and i would go out back, hang out, get stoned, and just say what needed to be said. She really touched me in a way that even my words cannot describe. She was also like a mother to me. She helped me become myself, and assisted me to overcome my autism. I now realize, I AM NOT BROKEN! I am who I am, and I am so proud of that fact. Thank you, fellow opussers, so very much for bringing me in and accepting me, faults and all. Peace for now. Always, Ember.