from now on i wish i could hold you close to me in public sometimes; my touch means nothing but fun to you and even if i try to you hold me back from doing it ... i waited all night yesterday for you to hold my hand while we were walking outside but you cant even hug me without looking repulsed i cant help that i often fantasize about being your first option even though i know you sleep with me because you dont have any... i must learn how to love myself more and start expecting some importance and respect from anybody who wants to get involved with me