back to bournemouth so today started like any other day; wake up, play on phone, walk Billy (my springer spaniel, he will probably be mentioned in most of my posts) but today was different i knew i had to make my way back to bournemouth for uni, like many other students. i thought i was okay with it, getting to see everyone. its not like i had to make new friends or learn to live without my family i have already spent 3 months doing that. this should be a breeze, right? wrong. okay well its been like 5 hours and i feel like the nervous freshy i was in September, all wide eyed and ready to make the most of time. i keep thinking that maybe everyone decided they hated me over christmas break, maybe they all meet up without me and have a closer bond. maybe i should have texted them all the time? maybe i should have appeared to make more effort? but then at the same time my sassy Blair Waldorf questions why i should care? if they don't like me fuck them! why didn't they make the first move with a text to see how i was? maybe we were all to scared to seem annoying and didn't want to make the first move. i should probably stop being to paranoid. i not sure where it comes from but i feel like everyone has an inner paranoid self. i just feel like because im always the stronger friend emotionally and don't tend to show many feelings i cant make people aware of how i feel when my paranoid self comes more forward. anyway i thought i should share my success with you all. i read a book, well i finished a book (bare in mind i had only read 8 chapters of this book pre 2015). i got completely obsessed with the maze runner and it literally only took me 3 days to read the remaining 54 chapters which for me i found impressive. im about to start on we were liars which i read parts of from ibooks sample but i got the real thing for christmas so im excited to start. until next time xoxo A