Portal So writing a book. I know this is the the same Portal as @Uniwhal , we are writing it together I haven't finished and I haven't got very far but I'd like some feedback and corrections In a sea of aimless drones, a spot of blonde-brown marks the only head in that corridor that is not a mindless composure of greasy cells. As that head finally makes it out of the hallway, she stops for breath, as her destination was a mile away from her current point in that prison. She races past the gull grey buildings that hold oh so many years of torture and suffering. Her hazel eyes sparkle with joy as she begins to make out the huge beautiful old oak tree that had been there longer than the slaughterhouse she was in (and that's saying something) she smiled the first smile she wore that day as she remembered how Principal Sufood tried to cut it down last year and how she chained herself up to it to save it and how the glow coming from it provided her and her... "AMBER OVER HERE!!!" "HI OPAL!" Amber screamed at the short tanned figure she could barely see. Almost two minutes later Amber was on the emerald green grass, under the brightest sun in the turquoise blue sky. "Hi Jade, hi Amethyst!" Amber said trying to get her breath back. "Sup Amber?" replied the tall girl with oak brown hair that barely passed her ears, but you didn't notice that, you didn't notice the freckles dotted around her face but her eyes. Her eyes were greener than the grass she stood on, greener than the lushest rainforest, but they were as green as the fire in her heart you instantly knew was there.That made you want to be like her, in short her eyes were the very definition of brave and strong in the form of beauty. "Hi." said a voice from the shade of the oak tree, a girl was lying there, she was also tall, her long brownish blondeish hair lay in a mess all around her and over her eyes. Eyes that Amber knew that were light blue but not the shade of the ocean but the sound and feel of a warm summer breeze. " Where have you been? Stuck in the hall again?" asked the shortest girl there, the tanned being that Amber recognised from half a mile away, her hair dark and long, her eyes an electrifying purple that made you know how funny and casual she was but also made you know not to call her childish or cute, eyes that made her a thousand times taller than everyone present. Amber looked over her friends and the only place in where she could be herself, she always wanted to be more like them, her favourite colour rested in Opal's eyes, the fire she wanted was in Jade's voice and the kindness in Amethyst's soul was what she knew what was missing from her's. She always knew she was less than them, she was the dumbest, the ugliest, the weakest, but some thing she didn't know, she had filled the others with longing and envy. Her sparkling hazel eyes reflects the creativity that the others can only dream about, the creativity buried in Amber so deep almost no one knew was there after so many years of hatred and rejection, it was clear Amber was once strong and brave and kind but she was broken and a different Amber lay deep inside, and only the people that stood in front of her and the place she stood in could revile. "So what do you feel like doing?" Queried Amethyst from the shadows her hand over her eyes to protect them from the bright sun that she riveted but Amber lived for. "I don't know, you guys?" "No clue. Jade?" "Nope." "Oh my gosh BEST IDEA EVER!!!!!!" Screamed Amber "What?" Ask Opal "How about we play a game were I'ma lama and." DOOSH!!! CLUNK!!! As Amber was describing "the best idea ever" two of Sufood's slaves hit Amber over the head with a soccer ball dousing her to fall over and smack her head on the ground, as this happened often Jade was prepared and she was gone before Amber hit the ground searching for the jerks that dared wrong her friend. When Amber awoke she was not in the hospital wing but on the greenest leaves you did ever see she looked at her Aqua watch it was still lunchtime. "Where's Jade?" "She went looking for those jerks." Replied Amethyst. "Oh god" moaned Amber Just as Jade appeared Amber questioned her about what happened with the teachers pets and Jade just said "Let's just say there not coming back very soon..." Amber moaned, the last time Jade said t she got suspended for a month. "I told you stop doing that, I'm not worth it." "Don't worry they can't run to the teacher THIS time." Said Jade slowly as she said this Opal grabbed the ball from the ground and started hitting it against the tree as she did this the ball disappeared. "Where'd the ball go?" "No idea...." as Opal leaned against the tree something odd happened, her back merged with the tree and she screamed. As she was suspends to come in contact with solid oak and was met with an ablution she fell backwards through the oak tree but disappeared and did not come out the other side only her feet where visible. Jade grabbed her legs and pulled soon they could see her torso, then her shoulders and then her head witch had an outraged look on it her purple eyes zapping Jade as though being hit by lightning "Why the fudge would you so that?" Screamed Opal "Um... To save your #life?" "And take me away from the most beautiful sight ever!" Yelled Opal "WELL, ECUSUSE ME!!!" Shouted Jade sarcastically, her eyes made Opal feel a blazing heat as though be burnt at the sake "I was just trying to save your #life!" "What did it look like?" questioned Amber "It was Amazing I saw the most vibrant green, the richest blue, yellow brighter than the sun." Said Opal breathlessly, now Amber loved colours so she really wanted to see this and so "What did it look like?" questioned Amber "It was Amazing I saw the most vibrant green, the richest blue, yellow brighter than the sun." Said Opal breathlessly, now Amber loved colours so she really wanted to see this and so CANONBALL!!!!!" Screamed Amber as she jumped in to the huge oak tree that glowed brighter every second. "Right behind you!" Said Opal and she two dissapped in to the tree "Guys?" Ask Amethyst nervously as she walked around the tree. "Oh well we'll just have to ge-" but what her plan was we will never know because Jade just happened to shove Amethyst in to the tree "Ladies first." Said Jade in a smug voice then she remembered that her no one could hear her, swearing to herself she two jumped in the once solid tree. As she did this she saw what Opal described and more, not only was green that challenged the intensity of Jade eyes, the a blue only matched by the eyes of the girl she shoved seconds ago and yellow brighter than the prettiest daffodil she saw so much more, the most violent red and bright purple that matched Opal's eyes perfectly, she also saw a beautiful orange that'll made her think of a sun setting over the ocean,a beautiful orange spreading over the blue waves,of calmness, of Amber, A mix of blue and pink that made Jade laugh and think of Opal's very essence, a Blue that made you think not of an ocean but of the colour of the wind and Amethyst's soul. Other colours that Jade could never describe, colours that made Jade want to cry with happiness, to run around the world three and a half times, others made her sleepy and calm. So many colours she never head, saw or even knew of until this #life changing experience. Colours that are not part of this world. After what felt a #lifetime but it was too short for Jade to take in the colours beauty and depth she found her self in a field not unlike the one she just left, same emerald grass, same bright sky, same old oak. But as Jade looked around she saw the fields surroundings couldn't be more unlike the one she left in stead of gull grey buildings she saw one one side the grass turn steadily in to a white sand which turned in to a beautiful ocean, she could see on the other side a large forest that looked so lush and green Jade thought it was almost too natural, and there in the middle of the forest was what Jade thought was the most impressive of them all a tall mountain, no tall it was huge Jade herself pursued it to be at least three lightyears high though she could not see the top she knew what ever was up there she wanted it with all her hart, it was a long time before she could stop gazing at this wondrous sights, but when she did she noticed there where other things in the field. She ran towards the closest one who was looking at the ocean dreamily. She had dark auburn hair that just past her shoulders, she was wearing a airy light purple shirt and some dark blue jeans and was around Jade's age. Jade although she had never seen this girl before felt as if she knew her. When the girl's eyes past from the ocean to Jade's. she raised on eyebrow as though puzzled. "Jade?" she said in a voice that Jade was use to, then Jade met the girl's eyes they where hazel with just enough hints of blue, green and grey to make you think of an ocean after a storm, eyes that are Amber's. "Amber is that you?" "yes why wouldn't it be me?" "um because you look very different." "how do I look different?" "look at your hair." "Look at my hair, look at YOUR hair."