Translate   10 years ago

Awesome I hate that I'm emotional. I hate that I've been broken down 2 this point. I'm unstable. I'm insecure. I question even the things that I know r right. I'm weak. I'm misguided. I'm unmotivated. My circle, my support system has withered & damn near died. My road is bleak. The light at the end of my tunnel is almost outta batteries. But still I rise... Once upon a time I was confident & in control. Full of #life & ambition. Full of love & hope. Full of joy & grace. Optimistic & driven. Ready 2 face down any challenge head on. Anything that even dared 2 get in my way...boom, bam, gone. Outta my hair. I was God trusting & God fearing. Spiritually & emotionally unmovable. Lonely at times, but had no time 2 dwell. Cuz I...was on a mission 4 that I rose. Some how. Somewhere, I removed my armor. Let my guard down & opened myself up 2 things I thought I wanted. 2 people I thought would lift me & guide me 2 places I had never dreamed. And in a way, that's exactly what I got. I exposed myself 2 pain, heartache, feelings. Not only mine, but the feelings of others. 2 the point that I placed they're value over my own. 2 the point that I found myself submerged, drowning in the pleasing of others. Obsessed with their happiness almost 2 the point of suffocation. If I couldn't see happiness in them it was an instantaneous slap in the face as a reflection of me, even tho how could it really b cuz I am fucking awesome. That is y I rise. I rise because I am fucking awesome. Even at the lowest points of my scum filled #life of diuchebaggery. I remained fucking awesome. Talented in many areas, easy on the eyes & able 2 bring smiles 2 many without ever having 2 sacrifice mine. I've been fucking awesome, cooler than the other side of a pillow, so smooth u couldn't ruffle me with a brillow, pad no SOS. Fuck ur stress I'm fine. See, sometimes I forget that, I am who I am & everything that I am is what brought people in my #life, so those that try 2 change me will inevitably come 2 terms with the fact that THEY...ain't right. I'm so fucking awesome that I'm right on time even when I'm late, I'm early u just picked the wrong date and I will continue 2 fly this high until my demise. Maybe u'll miss me, maybe u won't. Maybe u'll care & if u don't. No one will miss me more than I do right now. I'm so fucking awesome I wear my face on a shirt just so u know, that I know my worth & that everyday I get stronger on thrive off the hurt. I mean yea...I could have been worse, I should have been better, I should have my shit 2gether but who am I 2 question the way God works. I had 2 fall so I could rise. I had 2 crawl so I could fly & so all that hate can watch my ass as I glide by. No lie, all truth I thought u knew, just who u was talking too or dealing with, tho I made it easy 2 4get. Just how awesome #life has been... Bitch, I'm Awesome

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