a motion Capture I went to the wake today And it was hard Harder than I expected it to be But there was her pictures, everywhere And I almost bolted when I saw her casket, far away But the line stretched on and through the church, really long And I thought to myself, 'how do they go on?' Her sister, smiling, a stranger to me, But when I broke down she gave me a hug. Her dad with a smile, right next to her waxy skin Mother so motherly, I was taken aback. How do you say, when you're thirty-two- 'I had a sister once, forever sixteen?' How do you, a parent, look at the photos of youth And see in comparison, just one grown-up? I almost made it without crying Nobody knew me But I knew her, and I know pain Such a difference between my grandfather's passing Where all of his friends had already gone And her, so young and vivent About 1400 are thought to go tomorrow To the funeral Which I'm going to as well, scared But I've made up I need to be a rock for my friends No crying, no tearing, no running away I have to be strong I have to have faith. Yes, I know you can be strong And show your emotions in the open But that's not who I am- And if it is, it's not who my friends think I am A pity for a later time, I can't pull back the curtain now. So unused to grief, Strangers to dying, My friends are young and their innocence is away, flying grief counselors thronged For the other students, also new To the world of aching around a hole Where used to be a person you once knew But I don't need them I've already learned The way I cope is fleeing And that is working okay. All I could get out was 'I'm so sorry' Isn't that the story of my #life.