Somebody Different
"Oh come on! Won't you wear a dress? Just for this one night?" My best friend Carol complains.
"No, it is way to cold and I am perfectly fine in pants." I argue. The truth is I'm trying to avoid stereotypes completely at the moment. I am a girl who loves sports but netball is a big exception, I prefer shorts over dresses and will refuse to wear makeup to change my appearance for others. I do not like nail polish, hair styles, singing or shopping but despite all my differences, I do not consider myself as a loser, loner or whatever names you want to call me. I'm different and not afraid to be. I love things for what they are not because everyone else loves them. I find joy in almost everything and will do my absolute best to avoid being a stereotypical girl, just because people want me to be.
"But it's a party!" She tells me shaking the dress in the air. "You have to wear a dress to a party." She explains.
"No I don't, who made those rules?" I ask.
"Society." She replies.
"Pfft." I roll my eyes. "I m wearing pants because I want to. I will not wear something that is uncomfortable when there is no reason except that everyone else is. I do not want to freeze and I look perfectly fine in pants, if I don't say so myself." I say in what might appear to be a stubborn attitude.
"Rose." She complains. "Why do you always try to stand out?" She asks throwing the dress onto the bed and sitting down on the floor opposite me.
"I don't try to stand out, I just don't try to stand in either." I reply searching through my shirts for a good one to wear.
"What?" She asks.
"All I'm saying is I'm not trying to stand out by being different, I'm just doing what I like to do and what makes me happy, not because it's what everyone else is doing." I explain.
"Alright, but I can tell you, everyone will be judging you." She warns.
"Good." I mutter as I pull out a white shirt. "They should judge me for who I am not who I'm trying to be." I reply truthfully.
Tonight, being the annual school Christmas party we want to get dressed up nicely. Carol, because she wants to look good but fit in with everyone. Me, because I enjoy looking good occasionally and would like to feel comfortable at a social event.
As Carol exits the bathroom wearing a stunning red sequin dress I stand up to observe her more. She twirls around, her brown curls flowing around her elegantly.
"What do you think?" She asks, putting her arms out in question.
"You look nice." I say in full honesty, then smiling at her. "So will you wear a dress?" She tries asking again.
"No, I am still going to wear pants." I say strongly.
"Alright it's your choice." She tells me. "But I'm warning you, everyone else is going to be wearing a dress." She reminds me.
"Not the boys." I joke back. I slip into my white sandals, light blue jeans, a woolen white singlet and Christmas jumper and put on a gold necklace. "What do you think?" I ask, at first worried about what she is going to say, then realising it wouldn't be the end of the world, I pose with my hands on my hips.
"You actually look good." She states.
"Actually?" I ask.
"Yeah well, you look nice." She admits.
"I know." I laugh, throwing the dress back at her.
She drops it on the ground before looking at me with a wide grin. "Will you let me do your hair?" She asks.
"Ah." I sigh. "Only because I know how much you love to do it." I slump down onto the desk chair. But really, besides the fact that I know she loves to do people's hair, the truth is I can't do anything nice myself and I would like to look nice tonight as it is a one off occasion.
"Thank you." She says childishly before running over to me. She ties my hair in a plait and whilst I'm not looking or paying attention quickly applies some makeup on me.
"Do I look alright?" I ask once she is done, anxiously touching my face.
"You look fine." She smiles. "Hey, don't touch your make up!" She swats my hand away.
Despite feeling self conscious in makeup, I take in my appearance. I wouldn't say I was horribly looking, I do feel weird in make up as it is not usually something I would wear but tonight, to make myself feel good I'll let it happen.
I usually believe that no matter what you think of your appearance, changing your face to appear beautiful for someone else is ridiculous. Most people put on makeup until they look acceptable in their own mind which is better but, we should accept who we are without it. Be free and not worry about changing for anyone else, we can change for ourselves and of course have goals towards body image-if it makes us happy, but letting ourselves feel down because of someone else's thought on body image should not be tolerated. I have my beliefs and although I have only scratched the surface of them, tonight, I will wear makeup, not only because it makes Carol happy and definitely not because it is what others will be doing, but because it makes me feel good about myself. Stereotypes can be thrown out the window, I'm going to do what makes me happy whether it makes me feel like 'a girl' or not.
"Are you ready to go?" She asks.
"Sure am." I reply.
We walk downstairs and Mum greets us with a smile and warm hug. "You two look gorgeous." She tells us, pulling out her phone and opening up the camera.
"Have fun." Dad smiles as he exits the kitchen.
After several photos we hop into Mum's car to go to school. When we arrive, there are people turning up and walking through the school yard from all directions. People talk, scream and laugh as they move towards the hall and the music is playing so loudly that it can be heard through the whole school grounds. A cool breeze blows gently past as we hop out of the car.
"Have fun girls." Mum grins as we hop out of the car.
"Thanks Mum." I say as I stand on the curb, not at all cold.
"I'll pick you up at 110." She tells us.
"Thank you, bye." I wave as we head towards the hall.
"This is so exciting." Carol squeals as we make our way across the carpark.
"Yeah, are you ready to party?" I ask her, sharing the excitement.
"You bet." She responds.
As we open the doors the music gets louder and the colourful beam lights flash in our faces. I look around at everyone wearing red, green, white and gold colours. The girls in the corner giggle and squeal as they whisper to each other. A group of boys in the middle of the hall whoop as they surround someone dancing on the floor. Another group of girls laugh loudly as they imitate the boys and a smaller group of boys stands by the food table enjoying the snacks. The thing I find most interesting is that I seem to be able to categorise everyone into their groups, there seems to be no odd people out, except me. I don't even fall upset for my sake though, I feel more upset for the people-boys and girls who have probably tried so hard to make sure that they fit in with a group. Caused themselves stress and havoc when really they should of all just done what made them feel comfortable, then there would be no odd ones out because there would be no distinct categories to fit into. Popular, cool, smart, nerdy...you know what I mean.
"Where should we go first?" I ask.
"Where do you want to go?" She asks looking around at everyone, waving at a girl over in the corner.
"Dance floor?" I ask back.
She is hesitant at first but she replies with a nod. We make our way to the dance floor and start to dance. I dance enthusiastically but Carol looks around shyly.
"What's wrong? Are you feeling ok?" I ask her.
"People are staring at us." She replies.
"And so they should, we're hot." I joke, whilst I continue dancing.
She smiles but stops dancing. "Believe me, I want to dance I really do, but people are looking at us and I feel like I am being judged. I know it shouldn't matter because if they are judging us for who we are then it is better off than them assuming something else, but us dancing is drawing too much attention and I just don't feel comfortable." She tells me looking nervous as if she is worried she has hurt my feelings.
"It's ok. We can dance later, I understand." I tell her walking towards the side of the room, surprised by her long-winded, very fast, honest answer.
"Hey, why don't we hang out with them for a while?" She suggests pointing to the girls in the corner.
"Alright let's go talk." I agree with slight worry that they won't like our presence. Then my conscious mind kicks in and realises again, it doesn't matter if they don't. Not everyone is going to like everyone in this world, some personalities don't match and there is nothing wrong with that. As long as your nice to them and have tried hard at the relationship then it's ok.
"Hello." I say as we walk up to them.
"Hello." Susan replies cheerfully.
"I like you dress." I compliment one of the girls.
"Yeah me too." Carol adds. "Where do you get it?"
"Myers." She responds sounding confident.
"I like your dress." Julie compliments Carol.
"Oh I know right? Isn't it gorgeous?" I ask, her looking at Carol.
"Your jumper's pretty cute to." Susan's says laughing at my reindeer Christmas jumper.
"Thank you." I say looking down at myself and feeling confident amongst them.
"I should of worn pants and a jumper." Mikka says. "It's actually quite cold." She says rubbing her bare arms.
"Why are you wearing pants?" Jaz asks emerging from the group randomly, trying to make me feel excluded any bets.
"Because they don't match my dress." I reply sarcastically.
"Ok, whatever." She shrugs.
"Why did you wear a dress?" I ask back.
Carol looks over at me warningly "Please stop talking." She mouths, but I ignore her.
"Well why not?" Jaz answers.
"I just wanted to know how you would answer the question. I'm wearing pants because it's cold and they are comfortable. I wanted to know your justification to wearing a dress."
"Fine. I am wearing a dress because it is what everyone wears to parties, obviously...and it looks good on me." She says looking at me rudely.
Deciding that her answer could have been worse I don't say anything more. I was expecting her to say that girls don't wear pants and that I must be poor or something, but luckily she did not.
"Hey, why don't we go talk to those boys over there?" One of the girls suggests.
"Yeah let's go say hi." Another girl agrees.
They all move away from the wall and start to walk over the boys who are making loud shouts as they dance around.
"Hey." One flirts. Most of the guys stop to look around at her.
"Hello." One of the boys replies. The girls disperse off as they go to talk to different groups of boys.
"How you finding the party?" Jaz asks.
"Not too bad." He responds.
"It's such a lame party." She says.
"It's not really, I think it's alright." He responds looking around. I now recognise the boy as Fred, the guy I happen to have a crush on. He looks awkwardly around as she talks to him and I accidentally lock eyes with him.
"Quick let's go over here." I tell Carol pushing her slowly away, so we are far enough away from them so it is not awkward but so they are still in ear shot. We start dancing a little bit to the music but listening intently.
"Hey, I have a question." Jaz asks as she starts to dance.
"Yes, what is your question?" He asks looking almost irritated.
"I was wondering what you like about girls. What makes a girl stand out to you?" She says.
"Ah, oh. I think I want them, to be nice?" He says, stopping and starting unsurely, caught off guard by the question.
"So you would want them to be wealthy right? Good looking? And obviously have a fashion sense." She answers the questions for him.
"Well-" He begins.
"So someone like me, " She giggles, making me extremely furious that she is flirting with him in such a pathetic and shallow way. If only I had the confidence to go over there and save him. "I have money and a fashion sense and of course good looks and intelligence." She says and she laughs and gestures to her self.
"Honestly actually-" He tries again.
"If a girl was to wear pants to a party, what would you think of her?" She asks.
I roll my eyes and go to intervene but Carol stops me. "Hey I want to talk to her, she needs to understand something." I debate angrily trying to free my self from Carol's grip.
"Just listen." Carol holds me back.
Listening furiously I try my best to calm down, but the suddenness and stupidity to Jaz's question incredibly infuriates me and makes me want to go over there and lay things straight. I have some more respect for Fred at least, he is actually standing up for his own opinion, trying to get a say in and not just nodding and agreeing with everything she says.
"Well," He starts. "I would probably already like her more than all the other girls, that is if all the other girls are wearing dresses." He says.
I smile and must accidentally look at him for too long, because Fred glances over and I'm sure he smiles at me, call me crazy.
"Really?" She asks in a surprised tone.
"Yeah. It most likely means that she is different, she has her own opinions and isn't afraid to express them even if it means not fitting in. It probably means she is worth knowing because she is very interesting, probably beautiful and I'm sure courageous in her own way." He explains-smiling at her as she responds with a horrified look.
"Are you serious, you would like her more?" She asks twirling her hair in her fingers but looking taken aback.
"Yes and in all honesty, she would be the type of person I would want to get to know and hang out with." He smiles hotly and again I swear he looks directly into my eyes.
"Are-are you sure?" She says startled.
I stand their awkwardly, when the words finally process and I realise he is still smiling at me. I smile back. He steps forward and pushes Jaz out of the way-not hard enough mind you and he walks straight up to me. Still caught in what feels like a dream I turn towards Carol, but she has left. I try to subtly pinch myself because the idea of a guy coming up to me seems surprising.
"Hi." I grin nervously.
"Hi." He responds, probably just as nervous.
"Um, do you want to go get a drink of water?" I ask, not sure what to say.
"Yeah, that's cool." He heads over to the water table and I follow along next to him, trying not to focus on the awkward tension, but in all honesty it's the only thing I can focus on.
"So how are you enjoying the party?" I ask, then instantly want to hit myself as I reminded myself of Jaz flirting a few minutes ago.
"It's pretty good. I noticed you were listening to what I was saying before." He smiles but avoids eye contact.
"Yeah sorry." I apologise.
"No don't be sorry, I was talking to you." He tells me.
"Oh, I thought you were talking to Jaz." I reply.
He laughs very hotly. "Well yes, I was answering her question but the person I was describing was you." He looks down at me and attempts to make eye contact. I try to smile without looking too creepy.
"Oh." I run out of words to say. "Thank you." I say softly.
Whether we were caught up in the moment or they were true feelings, I didn't care at that stage. When he bent down to kiss me-although it was only on the cheek I didn't stop him, I didn't react and I didn't even feel awkward. I guess it was because at that moment he didn't make me feel like everyone else, he didn't make me feel awkward he made me feel special, he made me feel like I had value. In that moment I felt something that I had never felt before, I didn't just feel different, I felt unique and I can tell you, there wasn't one bit of it I didn't love.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read this short story. I hope you enjoyed it. Please Vote if you want to! Merry Christmas!!!!