I Can't Fix You
AGHHH so I wrote this like a WEEK ago and forgot to post it. That's what exams can do to a girl. YAY NO MORE EXAMS.
•Chapter Twelve•
•Phoenix•
Waking up with nobody beside me didn't put me in the best mood. I struggled to turn over in the bed, my legs tangled in a web of sheets. I stretched as I peered around the strange hotel room, quite satisfied with what I saw. It was a gorgeous room, caramel coloured walls and dark oak flooring to match the four poster bed I was in. There were filmy beige drapes floating down each side of the bed, just about see-through. I was tempted to snuggle back down into the warmth of the comforter, but I couldn't see Justin, and that worried me.
What if he had left me in the night? What if he'd changed his mind about running away? What if he'd realised he didn't really love me?
I scrambled to the end of the bed, not even bothering to pull my slipper boots on as my bare feet slapped against the wooden floor. I ran out of the bedroom and realised I had no idea where I was going, and this place was huge. I stumbled around the living area, and ended up in the dining room, not even thinking about calling out Justin's name. I was in too much of a daze. I reached the kitchen at last, and breathed a sigh of relief, Justin stood at the electric stove, frying pan in hand, a soft sizzle of bacon and the smell of cooked food filled the air.
"Good morning sleeping beauty" he chuckled, glancing over at me briefly. I stared at him, all shirtless and tattooed. No matter how many times he took his shirt off in front of me, I knew a little bit of drool would always make its way down the corner of my mouth.
"Hi" I stuttered, leaning against the doorframe in pyjama shorts and a white strapped tee. Fuck, I wasn't wearing any make up. I hadn't showered. Or brushed my teeth. And Justin was LOOKING at me. Oh my god, our unofficial relationship is over.
"You ok?" He asked, placing the pan down on the cooker again as he walked over to me. He took my hands, and kissed my nose, before wrapping his arms around my waist, burying himself in me, and kissing my neck and jaw.
"Baby?" He mumbled in that sexy, husky tone. I traced the intricate planes of muscle on his shoulders and back, as he looked at me softly.
"Ugh don't look at me, I'm not wearing any make up" I muttered, hiding my face in his collarbone and inhaling his warm, fresh scent.
"I don't care, you look beautiful, and you're having breakfast with me, in bed" Justin pulled back to smile at me, giving me gentle reassurance as he kissed my cheek softly, leaving briefly to plate up the food.
I yawned softly as he ushered me softly back through the hallway, a tray full of food and drink in his hands.
"How long have you been up?" I asked, parting the filmy curtains of the bed to fall down in the crinkled sheets, still warm where I had left them minutes ago.
"A few hours. I didn't sleep too good" he sighed softly, placing the tray down on the bed carefully, before cuddling up close beside me. We mirrored one and others positions, legs crossed, knees touching as we ate slowly, savouring the deliciousness of the home cooked food. The tv played csi quietly in the background.
Justin found ways to touch me as often as possible, little things like tucking strands of hair behind my ears, making small circles on the small of my back or caressing my waist. Each motion was tender, treating me like a fragile china doll, ready to break at any moment. It was kind of nice. Nobody had ever treated me like I was so... Special. I was nothing more than dirt to my father, and a freaking doormat to my brother.
I fell incredibly quiet incredibly fast, and it didn't take long for Justin to notice and become incredibly worried.
"Nixxi, what's up?".
Breakfast was abandoned.
I sat rigidly still, sniffling with a clenched jaw in an attempt to hold back salty tears.
"Phoenix, what's wrong? Please, tell me" Justin crooned, his hands reaching out to move me into his lap. He wrapped his arms around my waist as tightly as possible, and I buried my face in his chest, hands shaking in weakness at his neck.
"I'm- I'm-" I began to stutter, which seemed to be a normal thing for me when I got emotional. All sense of how to form words into sentences vanished.
Justin kissed my forehead and hair repeatedly, knowing it would distract me slightly.
"You're what baby? What's up?" He asked softly, his patience seeming to be unending.
How could I explain to him that in all of about two seconds, it had hit me. A stampede of pain to my lower stomach, my head, my breasts, my bones, everywhere in general was aching and crying for help.
"I'm hurting" I gasped, clinging to his shoulders, neck, chest, anywhere that was strong enough to support me.
Justin's grip on me tightened, not tight enough to hurt me, but tight enough to support everything that felt like giving up.
I was sobbing and crying absentmindedly.
"It's ok, Phoenix, look at me, where does it hurt?".
•Justin•
My exterior screamed calm and collected. My interior was a mess of concern, panic and disaster. All of a sudden, Phoenix had gone into what looked like a panic attack. Her breathing was erratic, as well as her hands. They shook and traveled everywhere on me, clinging to me for dear #life. I held on to her like she was about to fall ten stories to the ground.
"Phoenix, where does it hurt?" I tried again, and this time the response came quicker and easier.
"Everywhere" she groaned quietly, briefly taking a hand off me to wipe tears from her cheeks. She placed it back on my shoulder and gripped harder than before, almost as if the time she had spent not holding on to me was dangerous.
"Ok, I got that, but, there's gotta be one main source of pain, right? Where is that?" I asked softly, taking over the job of wiping her cheeks of tears.
She didn't say anything, just winced, took my hand, and placed it dangerously low on her stomach. My original reaction was to be aroused by the proximity of my hand to her sex, but It diminished itself when I remembered the pain she must be feeling. I winced realising the cause of the pain.
Adam. Fucking rapist asshole. If I ever saw him again... He better start praying for protection from The Lord, because there was no way he would get away with this in the long run.
I realised I had fallen incredibly silent, and my hand was still in the same location. I removed it awkwardly and kept it busy stroking her waist. Phoenix's sobs had become less violent as she sheltered herself in the crook of my arm, tucked to my chest.
"It's ok... I understand... That's gotta hurt pretty bad. We need to get you to a doctor" I suggested. Although it was more of a demanding instruction than a suggestion.
Phoenix didn't complain, which was unusual, seeing as though I'd never gotten her to even go near a hospital in the past. Wow, she must be in excruciating pain to not protest.
"I love you Justin" she whispered as she continued to cry silently.
I kissed her cheek before removing her slowly from my lap and standing beside the bed.
"Let's get dressed and get going" I babbled, pacing around the room to pick up various items of clothing.
Oh.
"Oh, and I love you too Phoenix".
She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. I guess that's what pain can do to a person.
Savanna
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