Be Myself Tonight I woke up this morning With a smile on my face A resolve to agree Or disagree with grace Now my cheeks ache From feigning delight How I wish to be Be myself tonight The day passed by quickly With me saying 'yes' I war with emotions The 'no' I suppress And no, it's not me Who agrees outright A mask to take off And be myself tonight A woman of poise Who lives a good #life The girl who has everything A satisfied wife The many masks I wear And take off each night When at last I'm alone Voices in my head I replay each scene What could have been instead My words, bared No sugar coated spiel Actions, spontaneous React on what I feel I'm scared, I'm weak Frustrated, and pained My solace are tears I let fall, free reign In the dark I can hide And do what is right At least for a moment Be myself tonight.

What He Wrote When He Missed Me I don't know why, but since this morning I kept on glancing at the door behind me... Conscious of the sound of fingerprint scanning, ever footstep tap tapping, coming from heels of unwanted people and passers-by - unwanted in my eyes... Up to now, I still glance once in a while, looking for the one person that has the perfect sounding walk, with her heels... That heavenly voice and uplifting laugh... Makes my day - but never came today. I sang, alone with all the people in the room I laughed, alone with all the smiling faces beside me - she did not come. It would have been the most beautiful Friday morning... --- Someone special wrote this for me in a post-it and left it on my desk one morning... Never fails to make me smile...

My Lightning There are two kinds of love The first.. felt like the road towards home. Long and winding, and yet Comfortable. This is the love I have with him. Familiar.. Safe. I know every curve, The feel of his arms is sure. I've memorized every trace of his lips.. His words are known, And my heart knows no surprise. For with him, I am home. But you are my lightning. The storm approaches, a distant thunder warns me. Yet you still struck me amidst the calm. You swept me off my feet My knees weaken. You wooed me with your words and enveloped me in brilliant light. You set my heart aflame. Again and again you came, catching me unaware. You are the second kind of love my heart sought, That it yearns. You leave me torn, and yet complete.. and I search for more. Your love has left me in chaos Yet it is you who is my reprieve. Is it so wrong to seek you? Your warmth in this cold, hard rain? Hold me then and be my refuge Keep me stranded for a while longer.

The first time, we tried to forget.. The second time, we tried to part.. We knew what we were getting ourselves into.. Yet why couldn't we stop.. Why couldn't I let go? Why do I love you? Why do you love me? What do we need from each other that makes it so hard to leave and not look back? What else are we longing for? What else am I looking for? Is it you? Could it be finally you...?

I Write To Express I write for the sheer joy of expressing myself A palette of words to paint a thought A feast for your palate adventures have brought To have you cry with me Or share in my laughter To feel the giddines of love Over and over To agree or disagree It doesn't quite matter To share is enough Not a game who is better I just want you to read and see my words for what they are A part of me I've let you see Even some hidden scars