My Comeback Hi guys! Blogging and writing are rarities at the minute for me, what with endless exams and revision and just general laziness to blog. I apologise and I hope you don't mind but in a week or so I will be returning! I look forward to blogging again. Love to you all, Velvet x x

Surprises.. I've not wrote for a while and I'm going to explain why in this post. There's a girl at my school, same year as me who is the #life and soul of the year. She's so beautiful and bubbly and great fun to be around. We're not exactly friends but she'll go out of her way to say 'hello' and smile at me as she does with many other students. Her #life to the outside world seems perfect, married parents, siblings with great jobs, a nice house, multiple cars, beautiful clothes and bedroom to die for.. But there is one imperfection about this girl. She has scars. It wasn't until recently that I saw the scars that ran across her arms. I'm a self-harmer so I instantly recognised those kind of scars. They were white slashes across her arms - their existence was due to her battle with #depression. I was sat in Textiles minding my own business when that girl came in. Her eyes were red from crying but her face told us otherwise. She had a huge smile on her face like nothing was bothering her but I knew it was. She went and sat alone in the corner of the classroom and got out her work. Then she rolled up her sleeve to scratch her arm and that's when I saw the scars. As soon as she acknowledged my stare she quickly pulled her sleeve down and looked away like nothing had happened. After that lesson, she came up to me and said something that I'll never forget. 'It's hard being the good guy you know, always helping out others and pretending I'm really happy when in reality I have my own problems to deal with and my sadness is so overwhelming it's just sort of invisible. Please don't say anything about what you saw and I wont say anything either.' She gestured to my arm and rolled up my sleeve and placed a finger on one of my many scars. 'A harmer detects a harmer, that's why you knew what my scars were.' She hugged me and walked away. It was a bizarre experience and I was in shock for the rest of the day. After that she drifted in and out of lessons but one night I got a phone call. It was her. She was in pieces on the phone and asked if I could help. She told me everything she had been through and it was some very horrific stuff. From that moment on I vowed to help her through it and she promised the same. We've recently got really close and I've been so caught up in helping her that I didn't have time for writing. It just goes to show that the happiest people aren't always genuine, they could be hiding something much worse. What makes it more horrible is that because no one knew she was upset, she had to face the brutal world on her own resorting to cutting to feel better. Don't judge a book by it's cover and certainly don't assume happy people aren't hurting, ask them if they're okay because you might just save a person. Velvet x x

Question Of The Day: What If #life Becomes Too Much? I have many questions that puzzle me and I've decided to start posting them because you guys could help! I've recently become in contact with another #depression sufferer, via mutual friends and she's a star. We're helping each other and she makes me feel like there is an end to this darkness. We confide in each other and help one another out. We also ask each other endless questions but we come across some that neither of us have the answer to.. 'WHAT IF LIFE BECOMES TOO MUCH?' Well the simple answer for me is.. I don't know. I don't honestly know what happens? Although I've been diagnosed with #depression, I haven't yet felt, and never hope I feel, like #life has become to much. But I did some research and many answers said that people may commit suicide or get sectioned or hide away.. Many extreme things and I want to stop these things happening. So I've devised 10 tips, along with Electra my new friend, to help if you're feeling like #life has become too much. 1. Eat healthier; research shows the eating healthier can boost your mood and make you more positive. Many teenagers sufferering #depression as a result of bullies is sourced by a weight problem so having a healthier diet will give you a healthier body image. 2. Get enough sleep; many people don't have the recommended dose of sleep so can wake up feeling exhausted and endure a day of being short tempered. So get enough sleep and feel more positive. 3. Clear out; do you hoard things? Do you take part in too many activities? Do you have too many friends on Facebook? Do you spend too much time on Twitter? Clearing out items you have hoarded helps you feel more positive and tidy about things. Cutting back on activities can make you feel in control again and lower stress levels. A simple thing like deleting people off of Facebook can make you feel better as you're essentially clearing out unwanted people. And deactivating Twitter could make you feel more positive and give you more time to channel your emotions and feel better. 4. Talk to somebody you trust; whether it be a close friend, a teacher or a parent.. Talking to someone can relieve stress and emotions that have built up. These people will want to help and support you through the hard stages in your #life.. A problem shared is a problem halved. 5. Be truthful; being truthful means you have no heaviness on your conscience and feelings of guilt or feeling like someone may find out that you've lied. #depression can make someone feel heavily guilty anyway so lying will just add to that. Don't lie and don't live in fear of consequences. 6. Make someone else feel happy; ever made someone smile? Ever complimented someone and they've replied 'aw that made my day!' Well remember the feeling of making someones day and how happy you felt. Complimenting people and generally being a nice person can help you feel happier as well as making others feel the same. Share happiness! 7. Wake up and smile; smiling releasing a hormone in your body which makes you feel happier. It also reduces frown lines as well so who wouldn't want to smile? Smile, look younger, feel happier. 8. Learn to love yourself; tell yourself that you're beautiful. Don't compare yourself to others and certainly don't say someone else is better than you, everyone is beautiful in their own way. Learn to like your body image and your face, get a unique sense of style and feel comfortable wearing it. The more respect you give yourself the more respect others will give you. 9. Meet deadlines; nothing worse than getting to school and your friends asking if you've done the Science homework which you completely forgot about. A sense of accomplishment can make you feel better and take away the burden of needing to rush work at the last minute. Completing work on deadlines also gives you a sense of freedom which everyone likes. 10. Ignore the comments; learn to block the comments people make. Learn to not let them bother you. Don't let other peoples remarks change you or how you do things. Everyone was born an individual and no one has the right to change that. Live your #life! The people who make fun of you aren't people worth the time of day. I'm no expert but I am a #depression sufferer and I know these things have helped improve my moods. Stay strong and things will get better. Love to you all and if you have any advice drop them in the comments below! Velvet x x

Returning To Reality Hi guys. So recently you may or may not have noticed that I haven't posted for a while.. Well the truth behind it is that I've been ill, erm mentally ill. I've been diagnosed with #depression and just couldn't face the outside world or anything that connected me to the outside world. I've become a recluse. I'm not writing this to get sympathy, I'm writing this so people understand the effects #depression can have on people. My weight has dropped dramatically which in itself has made me ill. My state of mind is, well, extremely unstable and I don't feel safe anytime or day in fear of what I could do to myself. I self harm now too as it gives me a way of showing how much I hate myself and in a strange way, I'm released from the pain bullies cause by inflicting pain on myself. It sounds so odd and weird but in all honestly it is, and no one will understand what it's like to feel like this until they experience the feelings, the fear, the exhaustion of hating yourself. I may as well be an alien. From here on out, I'm going to document my feelings and connect to the outside world via this just so any other 'victims' of #depression can relate to me and maybe one day my story could help someone. Velvet x x

Confusion Is Taking Over.. Okay, so this guy I like.. We speak everyday now over BBM and I can talk to him really easily and have a laugh and a joke with him but he's also good at sharing problems. When I see him at school though, he wont look at me nor will he speak to me. We walk back the same way from school and he'll ask me how I am but I can't find the words to say when I'm around him so I just say 'hi'. I reckon he thinks I'm really stupid and uncool but he insists this isn't the case. My friends say he likes me because he called me beautiful and keeps making an effort to speak to me. He seems interested in me over phone but at school it's like he couldn't care less. He's told all his friends about me liking him and now they keep taking the mickey out of me and chanting his name when we're around each other. Does that mean he isn't embarrassed by me? He seems like an awkward person in person and I don't know how to speak to him if he ever tries to talk to me? He will always use my name if he asks me if I'm okay in person too. He's also very flirtatious over BBM but that could just be his personality. Anyone who is good at reading boys, help me? I'm so confused by his behaviour and need to know the truth. Thank you! Velvet x x