No Money? Why not use ads? For the sake of the community. I know, they suck, and probably won't be much help anyway. Man, it is sad to see this go anyway.

Hey Heart: Hey, I love you. I do, I love you, and I can't do anything about it except tell you. I don't know what you'll think, or do, or say... I just think I should really come clean about how I feel, cause I never really tell anyone and just end up pushing them away. I don't know exactly what it is I'm feeling, but I do know I really care for you and I don't want to lose you. And it would be so amazing to actually meet you one day, hug you and just really talk, even if it's awkward or weird or whatever; I'll cherish each moment because nothing better could happen to me right now. I really want you, but there is no way we could ever be. I don't think we will ever even meet and I don't understand, I don't know what. The only thing between us is reality, and it really hurts sometimes. I don't really care about out differences, about what you're into: I just need some kind of relief from this monotony; I need to get away for a moment, if only I could just be someone else for a day. Or be with you for just a day and see what happens. Mind: I need to feel something, and I need to attach my emotion to something, or in this case, someone. I'm seeking fulfillment in the fleeting. Heart: But it would be the first time I just broke away and did something that made me happy on my standards, not what others think will make me happy, not what will make others happy, but what I believe will make me happy. Even if I end up being wrong, even if it resembles the young and reckless behaviours and is the stupidest thing I'll ever do. I won't regret it, because I'll know it's what I really wanted. I'll know that I did it for myself and not for anyone else, not because anyone told me to or influenced me into it. And it will be the best moment of my #life. "Seize the day!" they say. I will not only seize the day; I will make it mine in every way, and no one will take that away from me. I will open myself up to every possibility. I am ready. DEEP BREATH. Sigh. Me: I love you, but I will never tell you, because my mind is right, this will never go anywhere. I've indulged my heart's whims for too long. Well not anymore; by my foolishness I have broken it and I see no way to fix it. The future holds nothing now. Goodbye, my love. I wish you all the happiness I will never have. I have given you everything my heart was capable of and now I can give nothing more. Farewell, my love.

Yeah. "You're the person that ruined my fucking #life, apart from dad." I just sat there, unable to move, or speak, or do anything at all. I felt like I had been shocked into nonexistence. I heard laughter in another room, and music coming from the tv; I had a sense of time passing, although I felt frozen. I just sat there, not knowing what to think, feeling dysfunctional. Two lone tears sprung from my eyes and shattered onto the piano keys. How do you cope with that? How do you react to words like that coming from your twelve-year-old brother? I felt numb, surprised I could make it up the stairs and into my room. I thought of locking the door, but didn't. Everyone else is caught up in their own thing, and I know he won't seek to apologize. Merry Christmas to me.

Gone (pt 1) I did my best to appear confident. There was no way I was letting on that this was my first time away from home. I had decided to take this trip on my own, I couldn't take being stuck at home for another minute. There was too much tension, between my parents, between my sister and I... no wonder I had to get away. As the ferry approached the port, I took my backpack, wrapped my scarf around my neck and walked out of my cabin; I wanted to be the first off. As I walked off I heard rumbling thunder and it seemed as if the skies had opened up over me. Just my luck. I ran and tried to find shelter, although I was already soaked and the small covering I managed to find wasn't much help.

Losing It My mind has gone missing Somewhere, I don't know Maybe under my pillow In the drawer, on the floor? Oh, how could this happen I knew it from the start Tie up your mind Tie up your heart You'll lose them both if not!