[A HUSBAND AND WIFE AT HOME IN THE EVENING] [SHES COOKING. ROOTED TO THE SPOT]. HUSBAND: [ENTERS, HANGS COAT, KISSES HER, SITS AT TABLE] GOOD DAY? [ALWAYS PAUSES AFTER EACH LINE TO ALLOW SPACE FOR A RESPONSE THAT NEVER COMES] SHIT. JUST SHIT. [OPENS PAPER AND SIMULTANEOUSLY GRABS BREAD AND BUTTER THAT IS ALREADY ON THE TABLE] NOT REALLY PASTA? I MIGHT HAVE PASTA. FUCK ME, WHAT A DAY. [HE READS FOR A BIT, SHE COOKS FOR A BIT] HAS THE DOG BEEN OUT FOR A SHIT? [EVENTUALLY] SO WHAT DID YOU DO TODAY? [SHE IS FOCUSED ON THE SINK] NOTHING? YOU CANT HAVE DONE NOTHING. YOU MUST HAVE DONE SOMETHING. DID YOU RING YOUR MUM? DID YOUR MUM RING YOU. ANYTHING GOOD ON TELLY? YOU'LL BE DOING YOUR EXERCISE I SUPPOSE? I MIGHT WATCH THE FOOTBALL OKAY? PROBABLY BE SHIT. [THEIR EYES NEVER MEET]
Hilary Paterson-Jones
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Munford
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