And I Still Wonder! So it's the 4th of January! I can't believe the time have went by so fast. There has been something bothering me all day. I've had loads of relationships but the one I'm in now is just so different. You know when you get the feeling that things are too good to be right?' I've been seeing an woman abuser, druggy, alcoholic and simply men that had this BIG problem. And now when it comes to my preset boyfriend it just seems unreal!! So all this makes me wonder about LOVE? I know I've never been in love. If something I've been without a heart whatsoever. Relationships never really bothered me. Neither did just guys I like whatever whatever... And now stuck in a place where I get chessy and all just.... ALL OVER HIM!! Is it love!? How do you know when your in love? An why Exactly I'm so scared of it!? Why I'm so embarrassed about it? When it comes to me than I've never showed any feeling to people. Maybe I even haven't had any! I don't remember the last time I cried.. Or the last time I even said awh to something sweet and romantic etc. Feelings doesn't come easy for me.. Like at all!! Maybe it's because of the way I grew up. Or maybe it's just me. But now. This man have me woken up.. (Or maybe made me dream?) Half of me wants to turn around to him and tell him to get outta my #life.. But I don't think I can anymore. Looks like it took me 20 years to fall for someone. To feel?!! But I still have this question that haven't been answered.. What is love? And how do you know when you love?