Fidelity & Compromise There are two things that anyone seeking to be married should be familiar with long before saying "I do". Fidelity and compromise. When I say familiar, I don't mean just knowing the definition of the words. I mean it in the sense of practicing both. Several people talk to me about their relationship issues/woes and 9 times out of 10, their "problems" can be traced back to one of these issues. Some people feel that until they say "I do", their loyalty shouldn't be called into question because they're single. The minute they stand before an ordained minister, family, and friends, the promise of staying with this one person until death separates them, immediately comes into focus. No more sexual relationships aside from this person they're lovingly gazing at. All because two words can break their habitual behavior they've repeatedly had since their first/second relationship. If this worked, the divorce rate would drop exponentially. Others think that by not holding fast to their list of requirements in a mate, they're settling. Being the marrying type, they've always had some form of a list, maybe even dating back to childhood. Man or woman, written list or mentally embedded, doesn't matter. This list has become more important than loving and growing with someone. So much so that they grow depressed and full of anxiety if they haven't found this ideal by the time they enter their 30s. Plenty of people will enter their lives and exit it because out of the 20 things they want, some only had 18 or 19. No room for compromise. In marriage this often leads to divorce under the terms of irreconcilable differences. If you've ever seen War of The Roses, you get a perfect view of what no compromise from either party can look like. Exaggerated for theatrical purposes but nevertheless still making the point that if you have no room for compromise before marriage, it's highly unlikely you'll make room for it later.