Translate   12 years ago

The Beginning Of The First Betrayal It was faith or maybe just my addiction tocigarettes. For one cigarette I met him . The father of my son Will. I never thought that one moment would change my #life but it did . For the worse or better its for you to decide . I am still trying to figure it out . That night I went out with my friends after coming back from a months vacation. The usual drinking and smoking. My friend asked a guy for a cigarette and when he approached her so did his other friends. They asked us to join them. A few minutes inside the bar and a fight broke out. Will and his friends were involved . The owner a friend I there's told him and his friend to leave threw the back door . At the corner was Will's car parked he asked us to get in my friends and I . At first I refused but my best friend stef jumped right in . I didn't leave her alone so I got in and my other two friends followed . That night we went to another bar and kept drink . Will was interested in me but since I paid no attention to him . He started talking to my friend Steff. That same morning after I got home my mother kicked me out of the house . After that happened I stayed in my fathers business until night time . At night my friend Steff asked me to join her and Will in a double date with his friend Ed . I agreed under the condition that if I went she would let me stay at her house .my father allowed me to go since I was going to stay over her house . The night came we went out danced and talked at the end Steff told me her parents didn't let me sleep over and I argue that I had no place to stay . Will then said I could stay in his living room . I disagreed since he was talking to my best friend. Steff immediately agreed. I refused saying I barely know him and I didn't like the idea.Having no place to stay I went . That night I got to his house in the morning with him . He asked if I wanted to watch a movie . I said "yes". At the next day I woke up and he invited me to the beach.Having no place to go and he gave me some clothes to change I went . The whole day we talked and go to know each other. At least he got to know me. I kepted on not answering Steff's text or phone calls that day . I denied the fact that I was still with him or that I was starting to like him . At the end from that day on I started staying in his house . He told me he liked me and hasn't liked anyone for awhile . He asked me to stay with him until things get better. I agreed but told him it was best for him not to tell Steff. Days went by we kept living together ,sleeping ,talking having fun . As the days went by I liked him more and more. After three weeks the problems started he wanted me to hang out with his friends . Having met them the day at the beach I didn't like them . After that he would leave me in the house in the room alone. I would call he won't answer or say he was busy . I would call he would say he was busy working . I didn't know what he didn't and didn't ask. He would come at 2 in the morning after not picking up the phone or answering my texts . I remember calling him answering telling me not to bother him not to call anymore . I would sit in the room our room crying. Asking myself why is he treating me this way if I didn't treat him bad . Days went by and nights till the first time he didn't come home . I felt alone in.that room so empty and betrayed. He then assured me that because of his job he couldn't come . His mother who lived with us and his brother told me the same thing. I let it go until it kept happening . Two months in to the relationship he kept not showing up and we fought . His mother decide he would leave and I would stay . Since I was his partner I would stay and he could leave and come back when he decide what he wanted to go . He would then go visit me somedays. Others I won't even see him . I would go to work ask him to give me a ride since I would get at the train station at 4 am. He would tell me he is tried and to take a taxi. A week after and two months and a half into the relationship he got incarcerated for the first time since we met . After that I realized what he did for a living . Afterwards I realized I didn't know him at all not even his name. His mother then told me his #life story and his problems. The main one he could be send back to his home country . He asked me to stay in house house not to leave his side and to remain with his mother and family . I agreed and let everything that happened go. My first an worse mistake. Afterwards a day , a week a month went by . I stayed and remained by his side . I would go visit him and receive his calls . I also learned what he did and started taking over his for him . I did and became what he was. I had money I started working and learning from te business. All I did for him so I could pay for a lawyer or help maintain him while he was incarcerated . Two months went after his arrest when his mother told me that there was a woman looking for him . That women would change and scar me she was pregnant from him . While he said he was working and those unanswered calls , texts and to busy to talk . He ended up was with her . That day I cried like never before it felt like a plow a punch to my stomach . I drank that night with his mother . Se talked me into waiting to he came out to see if it was true or to see f it was his . So I did I waited I stayed by his side I declared my love to him . We would write talk and see each other . When he came out three months later he confirmed to me it was his that the dates matched . He told me he didn't want nothing to do with her that she would just be he mother of his son and therefore nothing more. I listened I suffered I cried but never left . I learned what he did and became one more to the #life that I never imagine I would enter . I never knew it even existed. The sad part is from the one betrayal I didn't learn . I guess all those years in catholic school I learned to forgive. I stayed by his side and waited for his son to be born and allowed him to take her to hospital visits and support her financially and would even help him. My first mistake forgiving him with not doubting him without taking my feelings or valuing myself first. I would jeopardize my own freedom for his. I would do it just to be more or his world and less of mine the sane one the good one . This is only the beginning of one of my many sorrows caused by the one person I loved.

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