The Illness And The Wall Today was rather different I realized something really important.....that I can't be broken hearted my heart does Something to my whole body that makes me sick. The wall I built up is rather strong and I like this wall. I pushed him away not because I'm not attracted to him its because I don't want to feel like that again. I pulled away when he tried to kiss me I mean he kissed my cheek but I just don't want to get close to anyone for that matter anyways. It was all I wished for but do I really need to end up hurt again? No thats ok. I've found the cure to my illness it's quite simple it's keeping the wall up and never taking it down the wall and my illness hand in hand made of concrete,bricks,and steel. To teach me what happens when you fall too hard and you break into a million pieces that's why it's called falling in love and that's why in the end it's called a break up.its real tough but I have to do this! For me! To protect myself! Brick on brick stuck together with my blood I shed;and the emotions,yeah that supports my wall that acts like steel. I never ever ever want to fall ill like that again.