Dregs The Joy Of Being A Bar-steward This is me two decades into working in customer facing industries, over half of that in the pub trade and I think I have finally snapped. Day in and day out I'm having to deal with the moronic, vacant public and most of all they're so ignorant and downright rude. If I am serving you and hold out my hand for payment don't put your coins in a pool of beer, I don't have any transmittable disease you won't catch anything by politely placing your cash in my palm. I know you think you're next but so does everyone else and this bar is twenty five feet long, do the math asshole. I'm sure you're going to complain about the wait so please make sure that you have your order ready, pausing while you ask your mates what they want or struggling to remember what you had last time after giving me an ear bashing makes me want to kill you. Also if you have been there that long dont ask me if we do xxxx you are very vocal in how long you have been at the bar so you have had plenty of time to look. Make sure you understand what you are ordering, most drinks contain gluten, some contain nuts and a few, believe it or not, fruit; your condition not mine, I don't have time for you to fill out a questionnaire and take a blood test, manage your own shit. I aren't psychic, thingy wotsit and you know don't convey the meaning of your sentence, trust me I don't fucking know because I aren't you. I have been here all day you have been here twenty minutes don't start complaining that you are dying for a pint, my need is greater than yours. If you work or have worked in a pub show a little empathy or sympathy, you should know how shit it can get so don't tut or criticise the staff, all it does is piss us off and make you wait longer, we don't care how many pubs/clubs you've run, just stop being a dick. Again we don't give a fuck about you or your career. Mind your surroundings, if u am carrying the equivalent of a small neutron star in glasses don't stand in the gap in the bar, in fact don't stand there ever. My space not yours, go find a seat fuckwit. The girls behind the bar are barmaids not whores, shut your fucking mouth and show some respect, they are our sisters, our mothers, our friends and mother to our children, I don't care what you would do to her and she certainly doesn't. It's called an inner monologue for a reason, if you can't keep it to yourself fuck off home to wank into that sock like you were going to anyway. Don't cheer when glass breaks, someone probably just got lacerated you pricks. Don't complain about the tv channel, it's my telly not yours. Don't care how much it costs where you come from this is the price here. I suppose ultimately what I'm saying is that the public are utter tossers and anyone that has deal with them deserves more credit than they really get, so here goes: You, yes, you. The man or woman that has to put up with shit like this on a daily basis, whether service or retail what follows is heartfelt and true...thankyou, should we ever anonymously meet, I'll try not to be a dick.