The Swell Feeling Of Caffeine It wraps around your consciousness after the first hit. You might feel your thoughts dissipate like mist. The second cup of coffee will gather the thoughts and ready them in organized groups by size. The third cup of black liquid goes down your throat and before you know it, the gates of gab have been unleashed. You are talking non-stop to your peers. Though it feels as if time has slowed down, you carry on at lightening speed, dispensing thought after thought. It's a bit nerve racking. You never knew that idea was possible to enunciate. It swam in your head a thousand times over. The shower head drilled down your spine streams of water at a rapid pace. And the idea just sat there, hitting against every wall, just aching to come out of its hole. The caffeine is doing its job. It's working, adapting to the environment around you. You carry the longest conversation as your friends stay silent, trying to absorb the nonsense. It's unfiltered, and pure, unadulterated storytelling empowered by a drug, yes a drug. Your fingertips become numb but you shake the feeling off. You ignore the chattering teeth or the twitching nose and focus on the story before you. It starts settling in your bloodstream. The caffeine has taken over and your body accepts defeat. Fatigue begins to settle as a viable option on this comfy red plush restaurant booth. The waiter hands over the check to you with a wonderful smile. You notice a sparkle of joy lingering in the crevices of her cheeks. Brushed red with paint but you know it's the blood rushing to the surface. She also had some caffeine, you just know it somehow. As your friends begin to exchange their chatter, you share in the laughter. You are alive, kicking, breathing at the perfect pace. This Sunday morning, you are at your prime. The waiter comes to pick up the check; her tender pink cheeks begin to fade. She braces you with a smile and says, "Do you boys need anything else?" No thank you ma'am. This coffee here is just enough for me.

Everything Hits You Hardest At Night It's quiet in my head except for the light rhythms reverberating from my headphones. I didn't have to press play since the music continued playing. The sound is light and honest like the buzzing of the bumblebee feeding on the nectar of tulips. There is a damp road outside my window with cars passing swiftly with warning as the cops grow suspicious. My feet are pressed against the wall. The wall is slathered with regular white paint. Not eggshell or cream but typical white. Sometimes I see the wavelengths of the songs I play float around me. I tell people I'm not crazy. I wish they could see what I see. They can't see the thin bands of blue or the bass line of the music in maroon, bouncing on and off my faux wood table. The glow of the computer screen is washing over me, my skin feels jagged and dry. I touch it slightly, just grazing the surface. I often need to remind myself that I'm still here, blinking morse code. It's scary though that I can still feel after all. I mean, I am human and humans feel! What a silly thought that they might not be able to. But the agony of loneliness feels unnatural. I look around and see objects caught in the shadow casted by the street light. They are here with me as I am alone. I'll finish typing away on my keyboard to complete the work waiting for me. It will lack compassion and love though, sorry. It won't have your frills and joyful starry occasions on a Thursday morning. It will just be the canvas of a web browser and a blinking cursor, waiting for my instructions. My partner in crime is the music lost in the depths of my ear canal. And me? I'm lonely, waiting for someone's voice to become wavelengths in front of me. I was told I would hear the sound at 1:38am, and it would just say hello and hang up. Now that's not nice and not nearly enough to satiate me. But it will help the loneliness turn into nothing. The "hello" will accompany my thoughts and all of my stresses as I stay awake at night. I invite you to watch closely as the wavelengths dance around me, additional thoughts unwelcome.