Leaving the garden, hand-in-hand You wrote me a handful of words once Strung together in your elegant way Read near train tracks in darkness With tears of joy falling down my cheeks Because - for the first time - It was clear that this was real... Not something I dreamt up on my own, asleep. Someone loved me. Then years followed, weekends spent In each others arms and weekdays spent Our ears to our telephones, waiting For the moment we’d see each other in a crowded train station. Necks crained and hearts racing, Reunions like no other. We took those for granted, perhaps, Realised too late that our days were numbered Built tall brick walls; Flirted with numbness. One day we looked at each other - realised we were out of paradise. A sad memory now: walking hand-in-hand out the garden.

Friction The slight downhill won't register For another kilometer or so, The trigger was silent - as always, A soft push, not a sudden blow. Soon we will notice the dark circles, Coldness caught in conversations, Delayed responses on the receiver, Dismissed electronic alerts - Glowing on your office desk. You will refuse to respond because Your chest is heavy and it hurts To think about unmet expectations And misleading miscommunication. First you need to figure out who He was before it turned sour, Recall the warmth of his palm Around your fingers. Freckles sprinkled On his cheeks like cinammon. His sideways smile and fractured Frown. His naked skin. Your heart is beating because for a Moment you forgive him, and love him, And need him and want him. In the Future you are happy. In the present, you are trying.

Too High More pain than happiness First signal to run, don't miss the starting gun Because his voice is in your ear Or you wish to hear your gut's verdict, Or your head is on his chest, Helplessly content with the rest. Had there been foul play, It would be easy to leave. But he was never the problem, You were the ink spill on paper in chapter one Yet you cling to promises that should have been met by now, Trust built by now Or you think, perhaps, the bar was set too high or Too low By him. And soft adjusting will do. But really, who cares? either way, we stumbled Hit some rocks on the slope, Fucked it up somehow.

Fickle You are the best thing that happened to me, You bring out the worst in me. My darling sweetheart whom I love. I cannot stand talking to you right now... But please stay up with me all evening, It's hopeless - all this conflict, but Never let me go because I know we'll make it, I don't trust what you are telling me, But touch me because I need your warmth, Stay away, we are burning. I cannot wait for our future - devastatingly vivid - Will we even see tomorrow? I thought maybe you would know. By now we should know.

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