When I Grow Up 6 year old son: "Dad, when I grow up I want to be a boxer, and be the best!" 5 year old son: " I want to be a football player and play for England!" 4 Year old son: "Dad, I want to be a dinosaur!" High hopes!

She's Not My Girlfriend Just a normal weekday evening, me and my wife in the front room with the baby and the other children are at the dinning room table. I could hear them talking as usual, but when I listened carefully I realised that my 4 year old and 5 year old sons where winding up my 6 year old son. "I don't like her, she's not my girlfriend!" shouted 6 year old. " Yes she is, yes she is!" chanted the other two. I then decided I was to sneak into the kitchen to get a good look at the commotion. As I peered around the door I witnessed the 4 year old dancing on his chair singing; "*****s got a girlfriend,*****s got a girlfriend!" As this was going on the 6 year old broke into tears denying this was true. As I broke up the argument to the 6 year olds relief my 5 year old son lifted his head from his dinner, his face smothered in gravy. Licking his lips he bellowed out "Dad! Have you got any more mash?!"

Dads Been Killed By A Cupboard Awaking on the kitchen floor covered in water, with my 6 year old leaning over me, as I start to panic as to how I've lost conciseness he reassured me that the kitchen cupboard door magically swung open and hit me in the head. As my wife strolled into the kitchen to see what all the commotion was about, 6year olds words were, "mum....dads on the floor, I think he's been killed by the cupboard!"