Suicide Note #2 From the day I was born You set me off to wonder alone I was so young and naïve Even though I tried, there was nothing I could achieve You said that I was worth nothing and useless You didn't care that I was small and clueless Now I'm all grown up and still locked in a cage Waiting and hoping that someday it will change That one day I will se the light of love and care I guess it's still far, because I can't see when or where When or where this pain is going to fade So until then I will hide under my shade A shade of loneliness and sorrow Praying to survive till the day we call tomorrow That day when I can replace my frown with a smile. But it feels so far and I can only wait until this while This day the pain has gotten so much worse It reached the limit I can no longer indorse The pain has gotten so immense It increased so much instead of getting less The pain has gotten so deep and profound The only way to its end, is to stab my heart and lie on the ground.

#life's The Control It's just a shame how #life decides to implement its rules on you. How no matter what you try you cannot escape its hold and therefore are obligated to live within its rules. That moment when #life has its strong hold on you that you cannot escape. A really strong one that even by death, it's impossible to eliminate. It's there. #life. You like it or not. It's not what you like. It's what IT wants it to be. And sometimes it's just that you really are a hell of unhappy without the thing that #life is keeping you away from. Something that is so close and so near although crazy out of reach. I'm talking about the moment when you meet what turns on the light to that little room where your heart is kept, illuminating it and its surroundings. And then something creeps In and cuts off the electricity. Leaving you in the dark with nothing but silence and hurt.

When you find your self smiling and laughing again in a long time and you question to your self if you still love that person. Then the answer hits you right in the gut and the heart ache starts again.

Suicide Note You said you loved me I was so small when you were holding me on your knee But now it seems like you've let go Because you changed and that's for sure You were always so delicate and protective But now your violent from every prospective You always shout and you always beat Your too strong for me to defeat I've always wondered what I have done Because even without reason Mercy you had none So this is where it has come Because my patience with you is done I could only tolerate it until tonight The choice I made could not be right But it's the only way I could be satisfied Because I tried.....and I tried But still there was no use So again....I lose I thought about my coming future But it's too far and I can't handle waiting in this torture I bet you won't cry Well if you do I know it's a lie Well these are the last words ill say before I die You once said you loved me And if its really true Than I just want to let you know That I do too.