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sydnerain

These are my twisted words.

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  • 9 posts
  • Female
  • 01-01-70
  • Living in United Kingdom

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sydnerain
Translate   13 years ago

9 Did you mean what you said? I want to live in your breath, I want to live in your words, in your throat, in you. You sound so true when you when you purse your lips, when you make sounds into my ears that caress my heart. They are so empty. I can only ignore what I know and listen to what I hear, because in this place I am happy and I am complete. Outside of you is like the outside world. I am safe here but have no place outside of your bedroom. Sing to me, talk to me, whisper your sweet nothings, give me the drug of acceptance and love and caring and let it sink into my veins. Just like you, my world is artificial and it takes pain to get here.

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    sydnerain
    Translate   13 years ago

    8 I don't know how I can sit here and expect to be treated like a person when I can't even treat myself like a person.

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      sydnerain
      Translate   13 years ago

      7 You could say it's been a long while since we've been kids and since we've been blinded. You could even say it's been a hell of a time, the seasons changing and our bodies still raging. And now it's come the time that this tie must be loosened this god damned anchor whose existence I've desperately denied. And now I don't want to be patient. I don't want to wait around and see and meet and know the person who is going to replace you.

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        sydnerain
        Translate   13 years ago

        6 For a while there I was feeling in control, powerful, on a pedestal, creating my ploy on a whim. Maybe I'm burned out, maybe I have cracked, perhaps I have approached a pitfall, because lately these tired eyes can't look at you without looking within too. I am a master of separation, a charlatan of sorts. My façade is simple and my message is short. I appear shallow, perhaps even dim, a little introverted but also capricious. I let this mask take me places where I would have normally never been, sweep me off my feet into realms I would otherwise never understand. But when the time comes, just how ready and just how willing will I be to let this veil rest, to disassemble the walls and ease this tight defense to show my veins my stomach my heart my naked chest my tears my neck and all of these vulnerabilities that I have kept? This sounds stupid and this sounds wrong, but holding up these walls doesn't really feel that powerful at all.

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          sydnerain
          Translate   13 years ago

          5 Well I've always known that I'm not always in the right mind, that sometimes I just might be crazy. But crazy is a loaded word. Crazy is you, crazy is me, but the crazy I'm talking about is crazed. It is mania, it is desire, it is the heart of irrationality and the fire of the earth itself. Sometimes, I am crazy. But you, you are something else. You are a different kind of crazy that bears a different explanation. You are the lure of the desire I speak of. You are the cunning artist that captures the intensity of the driven soul, you are dangerous. You are the seduction of the impulse felt by the passionate. You, are the kind of crazy that destroys and kills and dismantles and tears and deploys because you are the fuel to my fire. And I know, I know for fact, that you've got to be crazier than me.

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