Alone I've got friends now. At least I can call them friends. Yet, I feel so alone all the time. I miss home, I miss my parents, grandparents, my brother, little Scotch and all of my friends! I'll never stop missing them and I know I won't... I just want to feel at home here. It just doesn't feel the same. It just doesn't feel like home and I just don't feel safe! I'm sad almost all the time, I cry myself to sleep almost every night and I have to keep reminding myself to smile every second of everyday! Its getting so exhausting! I don't know if this will be worth it in the end...

Lets LOL The funny thing about #life is, nothing's ever for sure. Even when you are sure of something, something might not be so sure of you. Certainty is lacking and we have control over nothing. We are pawns and pawns we will remain for as long as we live. So, lets laugh out loud while we can, let's breath in the sweet air of today and lol in this moment! I don't know what tomorrow holds for me so ill hold today because I can!

Friends My best friend from high school was visiting me these three weeks. We have really been friends for a while. Two weeks I put up with her bossiness until I felt like a guest in my own home. Asked her to leave when she screamed at me last night. I have my home back! That's the thing about friends isn't it? You gain some and you loose some but you can't really ever tell which is a true gain and which is a true loss until its already happened.

Chances. So things have been okay...I get along with my tutor group pretty okay and I'm just okay! My #life is so monotonous. Grey. All I feel is grey. I still miss home, I still miss feeling loved and wanted. I've even considered having a boyfriend! I've never wanted one really...not unless I was madly in love with him and so I guess I want to fall madly in love with somebody... I want to know how if feels to be completely consumed by love and passion. I'm guessing it feels good. Taking #life in doses hoping I won't overdose anytime soon. I've been so careful and cautious all my #life so that I won't get stabbed in the back by someone I love. I guess I'm getting stabbed by loneliness now. I should have taken a chance on #life...should have just gone with it. I hope it's not too late. Just ask me again...ask me again and I'll say yes over and over! Just ask me again!

Belonging There was change! I felt a little belonging today... It felt nice. Hope it sticks!