Diary Of A Dictator Dear Diary, Where to start? What a horrible day it's been. There is talk of a revolution in the country and my advisors are telling me to step down because people are "unhappy". What the hell does that even mean? What happened to the good old days of people doing what I told them to do without causing a fuss? I remember when you just had to put a few of them in prison and everyone would fall in line for years. Shit.... I have to run.... I hear gunshots. .... Ok I'm back. My guards shot the intruders. We're safe for now. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes... I was telling you about the old days. People used to believe what I told them and supported me no matter what. And now? Nothing. Nobody believes a word I say. I blame this social media and Internet bollocks. No matter how many times we block them, people just find a way around. Don't even get me started on those fucking bloggers. As soon as you arrest one, another one pops up somewhere else. Don't these people have lives to get on with? I know unemployment is at a record high right now and with this crazy inflation they can't afford to do much. But it doesn't mean they have to sit in front of a computer all day and write about what a bastard I am. I spent millions paying telecom companies to give me equipment so I can monitor people's calls and messages. And for what? To hear people constantly talk about what a cunt I am? Maybe I should ban computers and mobile phones. After all, the world worked perfectly fine before they came along. My Grandfathers didn't have to deal with this shit and they happily ruled for decades. Maybe that's what I have to do to fix this. I'll talk to my advisors in the morning as see what we can do. Yeah the hell with mobiles,computers and Internet. We'll be just fine. Nighty night diary. We'll talk again tomorrow. I really enjoy your company as you're fast becoming my only friend in the world. X