Falling in love Falling in love...is like free diving! Jump and wish the parachute opens! I fell in love again. Thats something that, I thought, wouldn't happen to me again, but it did! So this time I jumped and she jumped with me ... and it felt amazing! The anticipation for the little things, the first kiss (oh that first kiss), the first make out, the first movie, the first dinner... And then her parachute opened and I panicked. Suddenly she was in a control and I was helpless. All that time of free fall I was excited, blind and she was studying me waiting for the right moment to strike. There is a time in a relationship that one will try and take control. And she did it, right at the time were she felt safe and powerful. Right at the time that she had everything going for her, right at the time I gave everything to her. And while i was falling I still wanted to make sure she was OK. There are times however in which even while you are free falling to your doom, you get to have a moment of clarity, although you don't get that chance often. If you do get it, then USE it WISELY. I didn't, i lost control, well it happens when i fall longer than you can take. All sort of other feelings take control ! She landed just as easy as she jumped, feeling all powerful off course and she walked away just like that. Obviously with her out of the picture my parachute opened as well, but not before a long, tormenting and lonely fall. You see, in love distances and time are so abstract because love is such an abstract term after all. It hurts when you come to realize how short the dive can be for someone that you gave so much, or for someone that said that loved you. When the parachute opened I saw things clearly. Still, it was painful . All i could see is her parachute that she left behind, used....And feeling used all the same I landed eventually, educated, experienced and different. I'm picking up my parachute and although i feel tempted to say I will not jump again, i will refrain by saying that when and if i do...? I'll make sure that my damn parachute is opened BEFORE I leave the plane...it's just so unfair...