At The Trump Medical School... Trump: "Hello sucker, I mean voter, I mean patient. How may I serve you today?" Patient: "Well, I'm in need of an operation, and since you're attempting to repeal the Affordable Care Act, I thought I had better come here to see what you offer." Trump: "A wise decision! I assure you that you'll be covered." (Aside: "In your grave!") Patient: "But Mr. Trump, how can you provide me with surgery never having attended medical school yourself?" Trump: "Bah! That's fake news! Another fabrication of the elite leftist media! I give the best operations ever...biggly!" Patient: "But Mr. Trump, you have no experience..." Trump: "Yeah, like I needed experience to be elected president by the biggest margin ever. Did you see the crowds at my inauguration?" Patient: "Mr. Trump, those aren't the facts..." Trump: "Alternative facts! The best facts ever! Reality is a buffet. You pick and choose what you want to believe." Patient: "Gee, I don't know, Mr. Trump..." Trump: "I'm a master of the deal. Did you see how I handled that hurricane in Texas? It really was all about me, you know. Besides, if you elect, err, I mean select medical services from me, for a limited time only, you'll receive absolutely free a degree from Trump University!" Patient: "But those degrees were also worthless, Mr. Trump..." Trump: "Wrong! It was the biggest witch hunt ever. It all depends on where you get your facts. I have the best genes, and the best words. But if you're just gonna waste my time, I've got a wall to build on the southern border. And you know who's gonna pay for it? - -Mexico!" Patient: "That's not likely either. - - Oh God, I'm doomed!" Trump: "Just making America great again, folks...like those fine people out there, carrying their Tiki torches and white supremacy posters! - - Nurse, prep this patent for surgery! Ole Doc Trump is fixin' to operate!" Patient: "I think I'm going to have a very bad day..." Trump: "You mean a bad four...no, eight years." Patient: (Screams) "Aieee!" (Scene fades to black) Patient: "