and baby i dream you were mine I have someone. Who I'm meant to clasp tight to my heart. I love them. I do. But those tender lips on mine isn't a picture I see in focus. With you I can almost see sex and home. I want to hold hands with her and lean my head in her lap, looking up at her pretty face and see her smile. But I want you to lean down and kiss me. I would cheat on her for you because today I feel like cheating the uncertainty we dance around daily. And we're circling the ballroom, my head is spinning and my heart hopes when my worn feet feel numb I fall back into his arms. I want to joke with him and for him to hold me and for it to just be that simple. I have someone to have but I can't stop desire. You're a fishing hook lodging deep in ny brain, the first scar to flurry my thoughts like a hurricane. He is strings, lying loose round my arms but when he pushes that ivory down with steady fingertips my spine is aligned and suddenly I'm a puppet. She is comfortable but not in the way a duvet feels on a living room sofa but in the same way echoing footsteps through school halls resonates routine. The way a uniform becomes you and earns your pride. And I cannot choose. Not through lack of choice but fear of choosing.