Dann McKenna - My Gay Acceptance Speech Chapter 1: Self Discovery A mothers worst fear is the day she catches her son trying on her lipstick, although for me of course, that was not the start of my journey to self discovery. I suppose I always knew I was gay, I struggled for a long time trying to accept it myself, never mind whether other people would accept it or not. This so called journey to self discovery started becoming the rockiest point in my #life, high school was the Bain of my #life. I remember making my way to certain lessons, I'll never forget just how far away that classroom door felt, that room that I knew I'd be safe in as soon as I reached it, but it was never safe. Everybody knew that I was 'different or 'messed up in the head' some people said. My self esteem was at its lowest point and it was all based on a lack of understanding, a lack of acceptance of the fact that I did indeed like men. I spent a good few years trying my hardest to date girls, that's the only thing in school that was viewed as 'normal' for a good right? Instead I would always receive such level of hatred from hateful individuals, 'batty rider' was the favourite of most. Although I had a few best friends from my childhood that were actually male, I knew within myself that I had a females mentality. Good self steam is the only thing I was seeking at that point, but the strength I never had back then is the strength I have today. I started to rebel against every rule possible because I felt I needed to make a stand, put myself behind the lense of people's minds to create scenes that could only create drama and entertainment for myself, I suppose you could say I got quite bored. I couldn't wait for the day that I'd leave them gates, I had so many ambitions and pursuing a drama career was one of them. I decided to attend a stage school in London called the Sylvia young theatre school, at first it was to focus my attention on something decent and attending drama school was my way of doing exactly that. It was my way of escaping reality by creating my own or following characters by performing scripts, I put myself totally in that characters shoes. The day finally come where I could leave school, it was the best thing to happen to me in a while. I started to go back to my home town of bedford on quite a regular basis as I was at a school and house outside of my hometown of bedford at the time. I started doing a lot if coke for my age and mixing in the wrong crowd. Then it wasn't long before I moved bac to the drug fueld town of bedford. Chapter 2: Chemical Substance - My Best Friend