My Story. hi. so i just want to tell you my story, even though i doubt any of you want to hear it.. Honestly, iv'e been through alot more than you think an normal teenager would. It all began one day when i was on facebook. there was this really cute guy from my old shcool, he was doing "truth is" he was cute, so i did it and i doubted he'd actually do mine.. but thats were i was wrong. he ending up doing mine. and he put "Rate:9 Truth is- you're a cutie :] " I'll never forget that day because thats what started me and him.. we began to talk, he was really sweet and i really started to like him. I was cutting when i met him, and he saved me, he save me he gave me reasons to stay on this earth, he showed me he cared, he callled me beautiful. He picked me up when i was down, i was at my worst and he saved me. And as sad as it to say if it weren't for him, i wouldn't even be here right now, this secound, and that maks me get upset and cry.. to know that once in my #life i let it get so bad to where i cut and wanted to be gone, and end my #life.. honestly its pathetic. Then i got attached and thats were i went wrong.. it ened screwing me over. sucks right? haha. i was so dumb for letting my self do that . I fell in love with him, i knew he liked me a lot. we talked a lot, and about how we were going to be together and it was going to work out, but he didn't want to ask me out untill we hung out more. so i was cool with that i really liked him so i was willing to wait till we hung out. so we would always make plans or talk about it but it would never work out, or anything so i was really upset. Then he invited me to the movies, of course i said yes. So i showed up with my sister and her boyfriend but they were watching a different movie. i was so excited about it, i couldn't wait to see him.. but then we were in the lobby, and we waited, and waited, and waited... but he didn't show up... i felt so stupid. infront of my sister and her boyfriend. I was so embaresssed. I felt worthless, and pathetic. I never have felt like that in such a long time since i stopped cutting. Then suddenly all the feelings of pain and hurt were coming back, i thought he'd never hurt me! I thought he cared! I just felt so dumb i held back the tears trying not to cry infront of my sister and her boyfriend. Dying inside whatching the movie in silence, sitting there with my sister and her boyfriend, ruining there date, just because my date didn't show up. Memoires flashed through me head of all the pain and hurt, the suidice letters, the cuts, the hidding the scars. It all came back. Feeling like that i just wanted to be gone, no one cared anyways. Then he started to act really distant. i just knew sadly we were coming to an end.. then he slowly stopped talking to me, and that really hurt. Like a lot. I couldn't take the pain i wanted to start cutting again so bad.. but i made so much progress i knew i couldn't ruin that. i just had to stay strong no matter what. So i did, and over time i healed it got better and I forget about it, yeah there were somedays were i thought about him and really missed him. But if it was meant to be he'd come back, i still would always love him. Then one day he messaged me on facebook and he said "i wanted to say this awhile back but i did not know how to put it to words at all so i will leave it at this when we were talking i was not talking to any other girls at all just you and i liked you a lot a lot but i wasnt not ready yet for realtionships i rushed but now i have myhead clear and kept thinking i was being self fish like i am so sorry you got hurt it hurt me when you said you were crying over me like you did not deserve any hurt at all i just kept thinking i threw away a precious diamond and left at that i have not been talking too other girls because i still really like you and i get it if you dont like me back but i walked away from an amazing girl as yourself and you're so beautiful i am a fool for that but i just wanted to tell you i was never talking to other girls and it stayed like that till now, I miss talking to you" I had to take him back, i loved him and that meesage was the best thing. he made my night. i didn't think we'd ever even talk again. Now we are together strong as ever we lasted 1 month about to be 2. Or so I thought. We saw each other every single weekend. We fell in love even more then ever. I met his mom, his brothers. He met my mom, my sisters there boyfriends lol. I thought nothing could ever go wrong I thought we would last all high school since we were moving to the same school next year. Then came that day... He was acting really distant, I began go cry. I had no idea why he was being like that, not texting back. Not seeing each other as much. Then one night he texted me.. Breaking my heart. He said he couldn't date me because of his bad grades. I was Broken.. I couldn't even handle it. I had no idea how to take it, I didn't want to believe it. I didn't talk to anyone for 4 days straight.. I couldn't believe he hurt me.. Again. When he said he wouldn't. Have you ever got that feeling, When you read something that feels like a stab in the heart
 and you just let out a huge sigh, your eyes start to feel all stingy, and you try to shut them tight to stop the tears from falling.
But you can’t. You just don’t even have enough strength for that. Yeah, that's how I felt. It was horrible, I never had cried so much before. The fact that he wants to be with me still but he can't because his parents. It just hurts. Till this day we haven't talked since that night. He's been trying to get his grades up, or as he says. That's all I know. But we've been broken up for a week now. It's just so hard. It still hurts a lot. But I've stopped cutting. For good. No more, ever. I've realized I have to many people who love and care about me. To just end my #life. I'm so grateful for everything and everyone I have in my #life. I guess when you really care about someone, you'll do whatever you can to make them happy. No matter how much it hurts. So that's what I have to do. I have to forget and not be stuck on him. If he's happy then I guess that's what best for him. He doesn't need me. So I need to face that fact, and that's my story.