Pulled
#RawWrite
#earlyapologies
I'm always pushed and pulled,
Never doing anything right,
I might as well be a robot,
And not put up a fight.
'BE ALL YOU CAN BE',
Society screams into my ears.
But when I do and end up winning,
My worst dreams become my fears.
'You're such a "try-hard" they taunt,
Mocking me directly in my face.
'You win everything and you're stuck-up'
Like #life is some kind of race.
And when I let go and give some slack,
Don't try my best at things,
They laugh and point and ridicule,
And make fun of me by all means.
And I'm tired of it, tired,
Constantly being mocked,
Taking mental blows to my mind,
My self-esteem getting socked.
For all they care, I could die,
And they'd be a-okay with that.
And it's not just my 'constant winning',
They also call me fat.
And if you think that doesn't sound,
Like it's bullying in a extreme way,
How about you take off your shoes,
And step into mine for a day.
Yeah, I know people are physically punched,
And ridiculed beyond belief,
And my excuse sounds like nothing,
Compared to their grief.
But at least one thing's true,
I don't cry to myself at night,
I don't make myself bleed;
I stay strong and fight.
But each day I face the torture,
The confusing battle between,
Being normal and average,
Or 'being all I can be'.
I'm not the girl who is dramatic,
And posts 'stay strong' on social networks,
I don't cut my wrists and hide the blade,
I'm just the girl with the weird quirks.
Yes, I try to be funny and nice like people want,
I'm smart in my classes, answering every question correct.
I try to defend myself, but people use it against me,
I'm not the girl with the outside, but the inside defect.
I really don't care if you say "It'll be okay,"
(I'm not trying to chase you off),
I just don't want to seem dramatic,
But then I don't want people to scoff.
I'm pretty sure I'm being dramatic now,
See I have a strange intellect.
I think of how different people will see me,
But I'd don't know if I'm correct.
I plan ahead about weird things,
See, this is what gets me in trouble,
I go off topic and think out stuff,
And people laugh at me by the double.
Oh, here we go again,
Off track like a tipped over train,
Just standing here with no umbrella,
In the relentless downpour of rain.
Yes, I know I don't have it as bad as some,
Of those who hate theirselves,
I'm not bullied, scientifically,
Just a forgotten toy on a shelf.
So I'd like to thank you all,
For reading this raw write,
I know it was a bit of a rant,
But now I'd like to say: Goodnight.
Just needed an outpour,
Thought I'd do it right here,
Not the dramatic kind,
Because that'd surely earn me a tear.
~~~~~~~
Sorry for the dramatic/nottryingtobedramatic rant. Thanks for reading if you did. I guess I just try to please everybody, then get ridiculed and mocked for everything I say or do. Thank you for reposting, liking, or commenting if you did. This post is in no offense to those boys and girls who are bullied every day. I know some stanzas sounded like I was trying to chase you off, but I wasn't. :/ urgghhh
Cataract / Stevo Owens
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