Annoying neighbours. When you get a new neighbour you expect them to be friendly and polite. Nope. My new neighbour has a daughter who keeps thinking that it is alright to come into my garden. It isn't and I always scare her of with a shotgun. Don't panic people I'm not a murdering sociopath. I have a license for it. Anyway when is acre her off her mother always comes to my front door demanding that I tell her why I pointed a gun at her daughter. I tell her that I have every right to scare trespassers of of my property. She doesn't like this and threatens to call the police. Go ahead love and I'll simply tell them I was chasing off a trespasser. This does my head in. They also play loud music which is ok during the afternoon, but not at stupid hours of the night say 2 o'clock in the morning. Their daughters annoying but their son thinks that he is hard. He isn't. He came swaggering up to me being a cocky little s**** but when he saw my Rottweiler he ran like a coward.

I have one of the weirdest friends ever. They decided that it would be a good idea to see how a dog would react if you set a firecracker off next to its head. I told them it was a bad ideas but they did it anyway. The result? Exactly what I said would happens the dog jumped up and ran around barking and confused. The dogs owner wasn't very happy and neither were parents that were around with their Title kids. All in all a strange but fun experiment for them. Well with the exception of scaring a dog half to death and getting glares from pretentious parents. Literally. A mother came up to us and demanded that I tell her what the hell we were doing. So I did what I usually do and told my friend to run. They did. Me hell I just laughed and walked off.

The Day The Aliens Came To Earth. Prologue: Nobody knows where the aliens came from. They just appeared from the sky and slowly took over the earth. They did not tolerate any resistance and would destroy one with extreme force and extreme prejudice. My name is Jessica Sanchez and this is the story of the aliens occupation of earth. Chapter 1. " hurry up, they could come back any minute" I said to Benny. He just looked at me and told me not to worry because the aliens would be busy investigating the explosion that we had caused as a diversion to get into one of the aliens facilities to snoop around and look for any information on alien movement. Suddenly I heard a sound coming closer to the building, and looked out of a window. When I saw the aliens were coming back I told Benny, he swore and said" we need to get out of here, because if the catch us them we are dead". I agreed with him and said" let's go". When we got outside we started to run in the opposite direction of the facility and had made it almost half way when one of the aliens, spotted us and alerted the others. They turned around and aimed their weapons and fired. Benny was hit in the back and was killed by an energy bolt. I got away and made it to the resistance headquarters, and reported that we hadn't got any intel on the enemy and that we had lost Benny to an alien laser round.

Women. Men like women, that's a fact. Unless you are homosexual. Then you like boys. Not that I have anything against homosexuals. Anyway what men like about women is their legs and their breasts or their rears, and when a guy sees and attractive women they sometimes stare and ogle. Feminists don't like this and think that all men are pigs just for looking at girls. Come on girls, not all men are like that. I'm not and I know a few of my male friends who aren't either. It is just a minority of men. I have a lot of respect for women because they fought for their rights such as being able to vote, being able to drink and smoke. That makes me think WOW. when you hear feminists moaning that men are b******s think to your self. A lot of women can be b****s too. It is an even playing field. Men can be bad but so can women too. So feminists. Stop your bloody moaning.